Since my mother’s passing, I’ve been doing a lot of paperwork. I had to get an Affidavit (what, in Dickens, the lower characters called an “affy davey”) of Something-Or-Other proving I’m legally authorized to claim the stuff Mom considered too small to put in both our names. If she had known what a headache that would be, she would have put everything in both our names.
But I digress. Simpson, Thomson & Colin (makes my fingers itch, not to put that Oxford comma in there) and all their previous incarnations, are our bidniss lawyers. They handled it when I adopted Charlie’s kids, f’rinstance.
So I went to them for the affy davey.
They have more accessible offices than the ones we first went to, up a steep, narrow staircase above the newspaper office. These are pretty classy. Here’s the front door, complete with doorfie.
Got me affy davey, wherein were listed her bank accounts and any checks that had come in payable to her. Like refunds for healthcare she wouldn’t be using and heartbreaking items like that. So an additional one came in, and I had to have the affidavit revised. They did that one for free.
Then this one investment account — okay, Franklin Templeton — started giving me extra grief. ‘Cause I need some extra grief right now, yeah? So I’m in the broker’s office and he calls them and he’s like, “What paperwork do I need to send you?” And he repeats what they say and writes it down. Then he reads it back to them. Then we do the paperwork. Two weeks later, he calls and says they want some other paper. Another two weeks, it’s something else. Two weeks later….
So then they call ME and say they can’t accept my affy davey because their name isn’t on it. I’m like, “Okay, I’ll get another one made with your name on it. What’s the amount?”
“We can’t tell you the amount without an affidavit.”
“But I need the amount. If it puts the total I need to claim above $50,000, I need to open an Estate Account rather than getting an affidavit.”
“So I need the amount.”
“So tell me the amount.”
“Can’t do it. Not without the affidavit.”
Catch 22, much?
They finally agreed to tell the broker the Topp Sekrit Amownt and he could tell me and I could tell the lawyer and the music goes round and round oh-oh-oh-ohh-oh-oh and it comes out here.
Armed with this information, I got a new affidavit. Not reasonable to expect another freebie, but I think they gave me a bulk discount.
Here’s the door I went through to see the lawyer with a bit of the big window I stand in while we pass papers back and forth.
I fully expect to hear back from Franklin Templeton in a couple of weeks with another hoop through which to jump.
The bottom line is: if you want security, Franklin Templeton is hella secure. If you want to see any money you put with them ever again in your life or your descendants’ lives, get lawyered up and hope for the best. I can recommend Simpson, Thompson & Colin very highly.
This, technically speaking, has been part of Norm Frampton’s Thursday Doors link-up. Visit Norm’s site, enjoy his wonderful photos, click on the blue frog link, and enter a world of doors.
A WRITING PROMPT BASED ON MY POST: A character has trouble getting money with or without legal troubles.