January

North Meets South

On the ’net, I convinced her I was a guy in her gated community who could double her money in a sure-thing day trade. Nearly worked.

I shouldn’t have sent that picture of “my son” building a snowman. Who knew it’s summer in Australia?

February

Aliens Among Us

Blx and I disguised ourselves, modeling schematics found in a store. Poor Blx chose “The Visible Man,” which is silly. I chose something scientific, yet it’s I to whom people point and laugh.

“Operation” is anatomically correct, isn’t it?

March

Useful

She’s twice my size, but I’m the man, so I’m on the roof, adjusting the antenna.

I shriek as I slip, dangling by one hand.

“Hang on! Don’t move!”

Five minutes. No siren.

“Hang on!”

No siren.

“Show’s over. Calling 911.”

April

Waltz

“Dance?”

“Love to!”

“Marry me?”

“I will!”

“How many years, now?”

“Too many!”

“Want a divorce?”

“God, yes!”

***

“Dance?”

May

At Odds

“Moonlight is so soothing.”

“Not to me.”

“I love to walk in the moonlight.”

“I’d rather run.”

“Hold me.”

I did, until she was still. Then I howled.

June

Hope

“Act like you have it, and it comes to you.”

“And you’re doing what?”

“Buying a wedding gown.”

“From?”

“Havisham’s.”

“I’ll wait to order the cake.”

July

Frame

It’s beautiful, really.

Humans invade our merfolk beaches. We attack. The blood attracts our enemies, the sharks, and they get blamed.

Win/win!

Well, not for the humans ….

August

Go Figure

1 marriage = 2 people

2 people + 1 on the side = eternal triangle

2 – 1 + 1 = 1 new marriage

2 + 1 bulldog cop = 25 to Life

September

Grim the Fire Dog

Act like a pup. Kids like pups.

This looked good: young couple, 3 kids under 4. Charm ’em, get in the house, burn it.

A 5-year-old came out in a Gruff T-shirt.

Damn! Foiled by my twin again!

October

Pumpkin Ever After

They empty me, carve a hideous face on me.

They put a green light in me on Halloween. I’m ghastly. Repulsive.

Even more so after I’ve sat, fly-blown and forgotten, for a month or so.

November

Longing

You long for Spring; I, Autumn.

In Spring, trees form an impenetrable green wall.

Autumn bares the view. I can see you. Or your closed blinds, thin shields from my longing gaze.

December

Regicide

I kill him every year at Solstice.

I’m the Summer King, you know, and he’s Winter.

He always looks different, but I know Winter when I see him.

And I kill him.

~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~

 Go to the Flashbacks link for all years’ Hot Flashes.