I ran out of pictures on my computer and had to go looking through physical albums. SO glad we have them!
This actually is part of Norm Frampton’s Thursday Doors link-up. Go to Norm’s page and, after you’ve enjoyed his wonderful pictures, click on the blue frog button and see some more pictures from other parts of the world. Not everybody is as long-winded as I am here today.
One year, my mother got a call telling her she had won a trip to the Bahamas. Of course, it was up to us to get to Florida. We would have a cruise from Florida, spend three days in the Bahamas, and then return to Orlando and stay a night or two in a luxury condominium, and all we had to pay for was getting there and back, everything we ate, and an hour of our time while a condo salesman tried to sell us a time share.
If I never go on another cruise, I’ll consider myself lucky. Didn’t get seasick, but bored? Oh, dear ghod, yes. This was Mom and #4 daughter when she was wee-ish, and me. Mom and I took turns standing in the corridor with #4 while the other one went into the casino and dropped a dollar’s worth of quarters — Did that. Played a slot machine. Never have to say I didn’t do that.
We went to a floor show, and it was too smutty for a wee-ish one and not funny enough for us.
The cruise ship’s very own Dating Game? No thanks.
One of the chefs did a presentation of how to cut vegetables into garnishes that we found delightful. Show a hick some fancy work with a knife and a humorous vegetable, and you’ve got yourself a happy hick, right there.
We spent most of the cruise out and all of the cruise back at the rails, watching flying fish one way and playful dolphins the other way. THAT was worth the trip!
The Bahamas, or whichever Bahama we were on, were … was … ANYWAY, the poor place had been taken over by us tourists, our buildings, our services, our preconceptions. We saw a “limbo show.” We saw a “beach hut bar.” We went to a beach that had an algae bloom on it so bad my eyes swelled shut and I had to be led back to the hotel. A lady who came around selling hair braiding felt sorry for me and braided my hair for free, but I’d rather have had my sight.
A man shouted at us that everybody hated us, he wanted us to know that.
Everybody we met was really pleasant, helpful, and kind, though. The people who wanted to sell us things needed to sell us things because, as the shouting man said, there wasn’t a whole lot available that didn’t involve the tourist dollar.
We went on a boat, we went on a submarine, we swam with dolphins who supposedly had the option to swim away to freedom but chose to stay for the easy money. We enjoyed all those things, and we had some great food. But the shadow of the shouting man caused me to see beyond the shiny bits and I couldn’t wait to get back to where I belonged.
When we got back to Orlando, the disappointed condo salesman nevertheless recommended a destination that wasn’t Disney World (which we’d been to before), and which I’ll post pictures about next week.
Now, here are the doors to some of the tourist traps of the island we were on.
I don’t think we passed through any of the doors to any of these shops, but the landscaping was gorgeous!
MA
Joey
February 2, 2017 at 9:22amYeah. A lot of that. Also, hot. You with your eye swell and me with my sunburn that required medical intervention. This could almost inspire me to write a hysterical post about the Bahamas, but I’m not risking it and will wait until my mother is senile or gone to God before that day comes!!!
Great taxi š
Marian Allen
February 2, 2017 at 9:41amOh, dear, any post that has to wait until your mother can’t read it is a post *I* want to read. Just sayin’.
Joey
February 2, 2017 at 9:50amYes ma’am.
Dan Antion
February 2, 2017 at 9:23amI will cruise vicariously through this post. No need for the actual thing. I enjoyed reading but I can sense lingering feel of that comment. By the way, how much do you normally tip a dolphin? Just curious.
Marian Allen
February 2, 2017 at 9:43amIf you tip them, they swim away. –Oh, you mean TIP. You don’t tip them; they work for scale.
Norm 2.0
February 2, 2017 at 3:07pmSounds like an interesting adventure but I have to say except for the Alaskan coast or the Fjords of Norway the cruise world hold no attraction for me.
Dolphins hanging around for the easy money or free fish? Probably teenagers š
Marian Allen
February 3, 2017 at 8:31amOoh, the Fjords of Norway! I’m trying to talk Charlie into that one, but it ain’t gonna happen. –Teenager dolphins bumming free fish! ~snicker~
John Holton
February 2, 2017 at 4:15pmI know people who love cruises and people who hate them, and the hates outnumber the loves. I can think of nothing more boring, myself. And expensive!
Marian Allen
February 3, 2017 at 8:32amBut THE LOVE BOAT always looked like so much fun!
jand
February 2, 2017 at 10:28pmI agree (again) with Norm that only cruises to a few places sound good to me. I’d rather go on a road trip (although not on the ocean, naturally.) I vicariously didn’t enjoy your cruise, either, but I did like the landscaping and the taxi story. š
janet
Marian Allen
February 3, 2017 at 8:36amI guess a cruise kind of IS a road trip on the ocean, only more expensive. We very much enjoyed the bits we very much enjoyed: the chef, the dolphins, and the flying fish.
Gordon
February 4, 2017 at 1:57amLOL; your words were worth more than 1,000 pics this week! So, now you know the crusie wasn’t free, did anyone sucumb to the timeshare pitch?
Marian Allen
February 4, 2017 at 11:23amWell, #4 Daughter was only a child, I’m po’, and Mom is the hardest sell on earth, so no. No condo for us. Mom was all like, “I’ve already spent as much on this free trip as I had budgeted for it.”
Gordon
February 4, 2017 at 4:44pmHaha, still laughing! I see where you get your humor from!