It’s His Own Fault #1LinerWeds

So I was at the doctor’s for my annual wellness checkup and the tech was checking my medications (two for blood pressure and three for anxiety/depression). The speaker was playing Escape (The Piña Colada Song), and the tech and I realized we were both humming along.

You know that one? It’s the one about the guy who was “tired” of his “old lady” and answered an ad in the personal column setting up a date with a woman who liked all the things he liked. When the woman showed up, it was his “old lady” and they bonded over all the things he liked and never knew she liked, too.

Me, I would have slapped him so hard his third cousin would fall down.

I said, “I don’t know why I love this song, because I hate this song.”

She knew exactly what I meant. She said, “Didn’t he ever talk to her? How long had they been together — long enough for him to get “tired” of her — and he didn’t know anything about her?”

And I said,

He’d never get his green card, I can tell you that.

To be fair, she didn’t know those things about him, so they deserve each other. (I hear my late mother in my head saying, “It’s just a song, Marian.”) Okay, Mom. Point taken.

This post is part of Linda G. Hill’s weekly blog hop, One-Liner Wednesday. If you have a one-liner or just like them, follow the link.

A WRITING PROMPT FROM ME TO YOU: A new insight on a long-time acquaintance.



I was born in Louisville, Kentucky, but now live in the woods in southern Indiana. Though I only write fiction, I love to read non-fiction. The more I learn about this world, the more fantastic I see it is.

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One thought on “It’s His Own Fault #1LinerWeds


    November 16, 2022 at 1:11pm

    I loved the song too- because it explained so many moronic folks always seeking the next thing. I finally got it- they’ve been clueless their whole life. (And, the melody is great. Oh, yeah- the group is also from around here, to boot)

    Permalink  ⋅ Reply
  2. Dan Antion

    November 16, 2022 at 7:05pm

    I’m taking a one-liner away from this: “I would have slapped him so hard his third cousin would fall down.” I love that.

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    • Author

      Marian Allen

      November 17, 2022 at 7:55am

      I have a vague notion I heard it elsewhere and adopted it as my own.

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      • Dan Antion

        November 17, 2022 at 8:54am

        That’s fine. Attribution not required. When I use it, I will preface it with, “a friend of mine would say…”

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