This is actually two sentences, but it’s one line. And it spotlights why I love Agent Phil Coulson of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Someone orders him to come out with his hands up. And he says: “If I come out, will you shoot me? Because…

“Same thing only different” is what my family says if two things are comparable in one way but not in other ways. It applies to today’s one-liner. We were talking about how many illnesses, mild to dreadful, are described as beginning with symptoms similar to…