As everyone who doesn’t stick their fingers in their ears and go LALALALA knows, I detest Halloween. Got nothing against the observation, per se, or the parties or the celebration of death as part of life. Got nothing against ghosts. Some of my best friends…

First, the obligatory explanation of why this is called Black Friday. Back in the day when business accounts were written by hand in paper ledgers, black ink was used for profit and red ink was used for losses. When the day after Thanksgiving became the…