by Marian Allen
Whaddya waking a man up for? I’m sleeping in the daytime ’cause I work third shift, that’s why. Don’t you cops ever work third shift? No wonder there’s so much crime around here. Maybe if you worked ’round the clock you’d figure out who offed that guy yesterday.
Whaddya asking me for? I was at work all night and asleep all day. You want to know anything goes on in this neighborhood, ask that crackpot next door at Number 12 or that nosy old bat on the other side at Number 16. Or go across the street to 15 and ask the witchy sisters. Any time of the day or night, you look up at their bedroom windows and you see the curtains pinched back just enough for a little peepy hole.
Oh, you did, eh? Oh, yeah? So what if I come home sometimes in the night. Sometimes I come home for lunch, like. Sometimes I need a tool I didn’t bring and I come back to get it. No law against that, is there?
No, I never seen that guy before. Okay, I took a better look, and I still never seen him before. What makes you think I did?
A lot of guys graduated from that prison. A lot of guys graduated from that wing. Yeah, okay, it’s possible I seen him sometime in the gym or the chow hall or whatever, but I guess I seen a lot of guys. A lot of them didn’t register with me. A lot of them you forget. A lot of them, you want to forget. This guy, I just don’t remember, okay?
If you say I got in a fight with him in the yard, I guess I did. This picture don’t look like nobody I remember.
Hell, no, you can’t come in. You got a warrant? Well, go get one, ’cause you ain’t coming in without one.
Your partner’s waving at you, there. Okay, I’ll wait right here. Okay, I won’t go in and close the door.
Aw, too bad somebody else collared the killer while you were fartin’ around giving me grief. See you in hell, clown.
Man, I about wet myself when he said he wanted to come in and search, and me with a bedroom full of hot goods. Dumb cop trying to do me for murdering a guy I don’t know if I ever met, and no clue he’s talking to a one-man burglary epidemic. I was laughing so hard I almost couldn’t get back to sleep.
For those just dropping in, this story is part of the StoryADayMay Challenge.
A WRITING PROMPT FOR YOU: Someone is falsely accused of a crime.