Hi, there! I’m Tipper Allen, and guess what? Momma says I was really naughty this week, and I didn’t even sneak out!
Momma says she’s working her way to being a vegan, but she had some chicken in the fridge, so she cooked it for her and #4 Hooman Sister. They left the bones on their plates and I did something I’ve never ever ever done before: I got on the table and dragged a bone onto the floor. Yes! I did!
Momma said this is a drumstick, but I’m pretty sure it’s a chicken bone.
She took it away and pulled all the not-bony parts off and put the not-bony parts on a plate on the floor. I didn’t want it, then. Neither did Chickie.
That’s another thing I did: Chickie and I were rough-housing and I tagged her on the nose.
I’m usually the one with the scratch, but this time I got her. I said, “How do you like it? Not much? Well, let that be a lesson to you.”
She acted all pitiful, but later she licked me on the head and then flopped over and kicked me in the face. I don’t think she learned one fluffin’ thing!
A WRITING PROMPT FOR ANIMALS: Do you steal food from your hooman?