The Sadness of the Scissors

Get a pencil and paper, because you may have to take notes to follow me.

This is why I have a Hello Kitty bandage on my left bird finger.

First, an illustrative photo. Keep it handy.

ScissorsOkay. So I was setting up one of Mom’s enteral feedings, opening the cans with that white-and-red can-opener thingy. You snug the tab into a slot in the end and lever the tab up.

Only the tab broke off inside the slot and stuck there. I use that thing all the time, so I needed to get the tab out.

Mr. Icepick to the rescue! I took the guard off the icepick — oops, no, the guard stayed on but the dull end came out of the handle, as it frequently does (I use the icepick to poke a hole in her medicine gelcap so I can squeeze the liquid into the water that all her medicine is dissolved in to put down her G-tube). THEN I took the guard off and got the tab out.

While I had the icepick out, I decided to mend it, so I got out the craft glue.

The cap of the craft glue wouldn’t come off (Hello? Glue?), so I got out the scissors and cut a little slit in the tube.

Icepick: mended!

Now, anybody who knows me knows I can’t be trusted with glue. There was glue all over me, all over the kitchen counter, and all over the scissors. So I cleaned everything up.


The goddamn scissors bit me! The freakin’ TOP of the blade is like a razor! I’m like, If the bad guys ever come for me, I want to be carrying those scissors.


So that’s why I’m wearing a bandage on my left bird finger.

I’m posting today at Fatal Foodies about a soup that turned out very differently than I planned, but delightful in another way.

A WRITING PROMPT FOR YOU: Your character has a complicated accident.




Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...


I was born in Louisville, Kentucky, but now live in the woods in southern Indiana. Though I only write fiction, I love to read non-fiction. The more I learn about this world, the more fantastic I see it is.

You may also like...

One thought on “The Sadness of the Scissors

  1. Dan Antion

    August 16, 2016 at 7:31am

    When I read “can” “can opener” “ice pick” “Scissors” – I just knew this couldn’t possibly end well, Marian. Why not just take out the clever?

    I hope your finger heals (as I assume you might be wishing you could use it now 🙂

    Seriously, of all the craft supply problems I’ve ever had, the worst ones involve glue.
    Dan Antion would love to share..CT Civilian Conservation Corps MuseumMy Profile

    Permalink  ⋅ Reply
  2. Jane

    August 16, 2016 at 9:07am

    At least you had some proper glue. That E6000 is the bomb!

    Permalink  ⋅ Reply
  3. Oh Marian, this is exactly the sort of thing that happens to me. Just know that I know. I understand this series of events. I am not epoxy-friendly. I have the same glue and lemme tell you, I’ve used it once. Now, I ask The Mister to use it. I’m not even allowed to be in the same room when he uses epoxies, lol!
    Joey would love to share..Die DoctorMy Profile

    Permalink  ⋅ Reply
    • Author

      Marian Allen

      August 16, 2016 at 12:22pm

      I’m glad I’m not alone. When I volunteered at the library, they wanted me to repair books. Fortunately, they gave me a throw-away to practice on. Lissen, if Spiderman and Slimer had a baby, and it got really ticked off at me, that’s what I looked like when somebody came and cut me free. Lucy Ricardo couldn’t have made more of a mess with Groucho Marx giving her instructions.
      Marian Allen would love to share..A DEAD GUY AT THE SUMMERHOUSEMy Profile

      Permalink  ⋅ Reply

Your email will not be published. Name and Email fields are required

CommentLuv badge

This blog uses premium CommentLuv which allows you to put your keywords with your name if you have had 3 approved comments. Use your real name and then @ your keywords (maximum of 3)

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.