A Sausage For Joey #Vegan

The other day, Joey recommended I try MorningStar Farm’s vegan sausages. I believe she recommended the links but ugh. So we tried the patties.

Also pretty ugh.

See, back when we lived in Louisville, we frequently drove past the silos in which Purina kept their soy whatever for making animal feed. Well, these patties taste like that smelled. Also: dry.

Now, I loves me some tofu, and I love soy sauce, and I love roasted soy nuts. But those don’t taste like Purina silos smell. Also: DRY.

Nevertheless, I had this sack o’ sausage-like soy product, so I ‘sperimented.

The directions say the recommended method of preparation is to heat them in a skillet, but you know me — I like to walk on the wild side. I put them in the microwave with big ol’ pats of vegan margarine on top and sprinkled them with Mrs. Dash — more on mine than on Charlie’s, because he doesn’t like peppery food.

Not too bad! Yeah, I would eat that again.

A WRITING PROMPT FOR YOU: A character tries, and almost succeeds, in reworking something into something better.




I was born in Louisville, Kentucky, but now live in the woods in southern Indiana. Though I only write fiction, I love to read non-fiction. The more I learn about this world, the more fantastic I see it is.

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One thought on “A Sausage For Joey #Vegan

  1. Dan Antion

    August 17, 2016 at 8:24am

    Since you handled this experiment so well, I see no need to try to replicate your results. I’ll try working with sausage made from, oh, I don’t know…maybe pork. I’ll handle the research over there. It will be nice to collaborate 🙂

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    • Author

      Marian Allen

      August 17, 2016 at 8:52am

      I hear that. I prefer the real to the ersatz, too, but, when I told Youngest Grandson that the Millers’ pigs were so lazy they hadn’t laid a ham all summer, he informed me where ham REALLY comes from. So I’m fighting trauma over here. heh

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  2. Joey

    August 17, 2016 at 8:30am

    Hmm…I dunno that I’ve even seen Morningstar patties. I do not want to eat anything that smells like pet food. Some mornings, I bout gag on the smell of canned cat food, which I’m sure, for cats, means it’s that much more delicious. Hork!
    I’m glad you were able to season this up and make it taste better. I still recommend the links, just cooked in the skillet with a bit of water, they’re pretty tasty.

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    • Author

      Marian Allen

      August 17, 2016 at 8:54am

      I’ve tried links before and YUCK. I couldn’t swear it was this brand, though, so maybe I’ll give them a whirl.

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  3. Jane

    August 17, 2016 at 9:35am

    Soy soy soy!
    I second that emotion about the silos!

    This all sounds like mystery food. 😉

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  4. Roy A Ackerman, PhD, EA

    August 17, 2016 at 9:09pm

    This reminds me when a friend tried to have me eat ersatz shrimp, saying they tasted like the real thing. Since I would never eat the real thing, why deal with the substitute?

    Permalink  ⋅ Reply
    • Author

      Marian Allen

      August 18, 2016 at 8:38am

      That’s what our vegan daughter says. Of course, she already knows what meat tastes like. I’m sure your friend thinks you’re missing something. You’re wise to know you can’t miss what you’ve never had. You could be intrigued by it, but you couldn’t miss it.

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