This one is actually mine. When #4 Daughter, the amazing Sara Marian, was little, we would walk over to Mom’s a couple of times a week to watch television programs we liked to see together. If we would be coming home after dark, we would take a flashlight or we would drive.
Sara said she was afraid of trees in the dark. That actually made sense, because you could walk into a tree and bonk your head or poke your eye out on a twig. I said I was afraid of ‘possums, which is silly, since they respond to perceived attacks by falling over and pretending to have a communicable disease.
“No,” I said. “Possums are fierce! Have you seen those beady little close-set eyes? And those sharp teeth?” Then I said–and God knows where this nonsense came from:
“They’d just as soon bite you as iron your shirt.”
That has now become my go-to phrase for anything threatening.
This post is part of Linda G. Hill’s weekly blog hop, One-Liner Wednesday. If you have a one-liner or just like them, follow the link.